Bdsm punishment how to

The punishment brings about many feelings and has many purposes. The woman feels the remorse for what she did, she feels that she is responsible for what she did, she feels closure that the infraction is over and she is forgiven. Often times the woman feels great relief after a punishment, she feels as though her husband loved her enough to administer the punishment. A purpose of a punishment is to have the woman pay the consequence of her behavor. There are reasons for the boundaries/rules and when one is broken there is a negative response or action because of it. The punishment gives the wife the closure for the infraction. It gives her guidance that the husband knows that she can do better, and gives her the push to do better. It also gives the couple away of dealing with the infraction without a long hurtful arguement.

There are many ways to punish and help bring that feeling of closure, love, and guidance.. One way is physically by spanking. This is not to say that my husband beats me, he doesn’t. This punishment is done consentually between us, we have both agreed that this is acceptable to us. That is the difference between punishment and abuse. The wife must consent to spanking, there are occasions that she will not want the spanking, but she must also consent to a spanking when she doesn’t want one. (confused yet?) Before a couple moves on to punishments they need to agree on what is acceptable and what is not. They both must understand that a punishment is not for enjoyment and the wife will not always want the spanking to happen. Ok, there are many ways that a spanking can happen: Over the knee (OTK) laying on the bed, draped over a chair. These are positions and I will go over them later. During a spanking it is very important that the smacks fall only on the buttocks or the top of the thighs, right below the buttocks (this is considered the sit spot) There should be no smacks on the back, the face, the stomach or anywhere else that was agreed upon before the punishments. The spanker must be aware that the small of the back is very sensitve and he should avoid applying smacks to the top of the buttocks, if hit here wrong there may be some perminant damage down to the spankee. The purpose of the spanking is not to damage the spankee. It is to get the message accross, get her attention, and to pay the consequence. No permant damage should ever result from a spanking. The spanking can be given with his hand or an implement such as a paddle, hairbrush, or belt. Again there must be agrements on what implements are acceptable. (some women can be very opposed to a cane or a switch, the man should respect these limits) The spanking can be done over clothing, or on a bare bottom. When using an implement there should be a warm up with the hand to prepare the bottom for the implement. Some couples have said that using an implement on a bare bottom is best so that the spanker can see the effect the implement is having on the spakee. Again the point is not to cause physical damage!.

Another way to punish is to take away privleges; loss of computer, car, television, or somethig that the wife enjoys. Remember, the punishment should fit the crime. If the wife spends all her time on the computer and fails to complete other tasks that should be done, loss of the computer is a justifable punishment.

Some couples use corner time as a way to punish and a way to prepare for a spanking. The corner time before a spanking gives the husband time to calm down before giving the spanking (Spanking should not be done while in the heat of anger!) And also give the wife time to think about why she is going to be spanked. Corner time can also be away of punishment by itself. When the husband does not think a spanking is in order, or that he just wants to stop her from her current behavor he can send her to the corner for a few minutes to think about what she is doing and why she should stop. If the behavor gets worse while in the corner, or she continues after the corner time the husband may then move on to a more severe punishment.

Another way to punish is to have the wife write out lines. This can be very helpful, when the husband wants her to stop something she is doing or if he doesn’t have time to sit with her for the corner time. If he is off to work, and she is giving him an attitude and he wants it stopped he could simply say “By the time I get home I want you to write 100 times ‘I will control my tongue'” and leave it at that. Should she not complete this task, again another punishment can be applied.

Remember these punishments are there to help bring the wife back inbounds when she has stepped out of bounds. Punishments should always be used in a loving manner. True they must be enforced with strength and sterness, but the woman should always know that you are doing this to help bring her back to where she should be, and that you are doing it out of love rather then petty anger.

These are just a few ways bdsm punishments can be used. Not all of them are right for everyone, each couple has to do what works, and leave the rest alone.

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